So this diary, its not just about having something to share or keeping a record of my pregnancy. Its also a kind of therapy.
Because being pregnant is tough – life is tough sometimes. And sometimes it can all feel a bit too much. At times like this it is so good to share or write down how your feeling. As i write this I am sat at the dining table choking down some yoghurt and raspberrys because i know my body needs it even though i’m not hungry. There are drying tears on my face and i’m wondering how i’ll get through the day.
Its not a major deal all things considered but at the moment it doesn’t take a lot to reduce me to a blubbering mess in minutes. In this case it is the fact that I am taking Wotsit to the vet for a 3rd time, I can’t feed her because she may need an anesthetic and she is crying at me because she is hungry and i’m scared she will need the anesthetic and won’t wake up and her last memory will be of mummy not feeding her. I cried again on the way to the vets in the car and had to call Giles to calm me down – the poor guy was on his way to a customer’s site and probably didn’t need to hear his hyperventilating wife’s wails ricocheting round his car at 8.30am. But needs must and he calmed me down enough to get me to the vet’s with slightly less red eyes. As it turned out I came home with her and the vet won’t see her for another week when she may or may not need the anesthetic then.
I went to work under somewhat off a cloud and snapped people’s head offs off for 7 hours, but hey i’m pregnant i’m allowed! My poor colleague’s – i’m surprised they haven’t put a rope round my desk space with a ‘Don’t anger the beast’ sticker attached.
Monday is also yoga day so I went to my class straight from work and by the time I came out I felt like a different person, it was like the pregnancy fog had lifted and I no longer felt like I might cry at any given moment, which must be good for baby as I am sure he doesn’t like all those stress and misery hormones flying about inside me. I went to sleep Monday night feeling him happily kicking my hand through my belly and I slept like a baby all night.
Something else worth noting is that it would appear Baby D likes a bit of Justin Beiber – here I am happily singing away at my desk to ‘What Do You Mean’ and he is rolling around in there as I sing – either that or he just likes me singing. I do sing Justin well I must say.
This weekend I finally cleared most of the spare room so it now looks like a nursery, all be it a rather empty one until I get the furniture. But at least it is ready to be decorated now. Hooray! Would you believe the hardest thing I did was assemble the Moses Basket stand? You needed a degree in engineering to put together that thing and it only came in 4 pieces.